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Thursday, July 12, 2012

The Target Fart Bandit


Dear Woman Who Farted Loudly and Obnoxiously in Target:


Today sugar balls and I were enjoying some time to ourselves while perusing Target in hopes to find a new bed spread (I'll get to that story later!) when low and behold you would never believe the audacity!

First off let me start by saying...I understand that we all get gas from time to time. However!!!! There is a time and a place for everything. What in your right mind would make you think that it was okay to walk down the aisle directly behind me and let one rip! People when I say rip...I mean ~~!RIP~~!! The loudest fart I have ever ever heard in public. I was thinking to myself was that what I think it was...you might want to go to the bathroom and wipe after that one!! Not to mention you stopped me dead in my tracks to turn around and see who in the hell would do that in Target...to my disbelief when I turned around you clearly looked me in my eyes and saw I was standing there...not to mention you were a WOMAN! I would say lady...but we all know ladies don't act that way. I couldn't help but laugh my a$$ off!! I couldn't get away fast enough to hide the uncontrollable laughter. Sugar balls stood by in disbelief as well!

SO I'm just wondering....and keep in mind this is coming from someone who would never even think about farting in front of my man (that I have been with for over 5 years) and in my sleep doesn't count! Why do you think that letting one loose in the middle of the home decor section in Target would be appropriate?

All right readers....I know you have a story about this...Have you ever let one rip in public?

Sincerely,

Gumdrops

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